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The BDSM relationship is mainly based on the two players who are dominant and submissive.

The dominant one believes in punishing the partner and the submissive one believes in accepting the pain of punishment to please the dominant.

The dominant gives a collar to the submissive partner to wear so that he/she can prove that she is owned by the dominant. There are different types of collars that the sub can wear for seeking the attention of the Dom.

Also, the sub doesn't need to have to wear the collar throughout the day. Some couples believe in a 24/7 BDSM relationship and therefore sub can wear this collar all the time. However, some subs only prefer wearing it during playtime.

Also read: BDSM PunishmentsBDSM Dating sitesBDSM GIfsSub punishmentshow to be a domfemdom ideassafe word ideashow to be a dom over textbdsm switch, how to be a good submissive

What is a Day Collar for Subs? BDSM Collar Meaning


A Day Collar is Collar designed in such a manner so that a sub can wear it during the daytime. While wearing it the objective is to prove that the sub is owned by the Dom and is living on Dom’s terms.

The SUB also ensures that the collar does not seek too much attention from others. Normally when a couple enters into a BDSM relationship, Dom wants his sub to be according to his rules and therefore Dom gives this collar to his sub to wear during the daytime outside the house.


The only reason to wear a day collar is to prove that the submissive is owned by the dominant and she enjoys the feeling of being owned. Some couples are always into the mindset of sex and therefore they always want to prove their commitment to their partner.

A submissive is a person who enjoys getting punished and she wants to give this feeling to her partner that he can again punish her in the night. In this manner, the sub creates an excitement for the coming sex time. 

Also, a Dom at times wants to dictate his terms to his sub and he may ask her to wear a collar during the daytime as a punishment or as a term to be his sub. He also ensures that the collar that she will wear will not be an attention seeker of others.

Only the Dom knows that she is wearing this collar for him. These collars can be different during different times. During the day, the sub can wear a string necklace so that it looks simple and can match her dress too.


There are two types of collars that Dom wants his sub to wear – one during the playtime which can be a leather D – ring collar and another one – a discreet collar that can be worn during the day just to prove the relationship and follow the rules. Let’s look at these collars one by one:

a. Collars for play and sub training

These are the collars that are mainly used for a BDSM sex. When a Dominant decides to punish his submissive, he may ask her to wear a collar so that he can make her a bitch and fuck her from behind.

These collars are usually sturdy and made of leather or of material which is like leather. These collars have an O-ring or a D – ring so that if the dominant wants he can attach laces too. These types of collars cannot be worn by the submissive in public.  

b. Discreet day Collars

Discreet collars are those collars that can be worn by the submissive in public too. These are made in such a manner so that a submissive can wear them fashionably. The designs of these collars are made in such a manner so that the dominant knows that it is worn for him only.

1. O-ring shaped

This is a collar which is usually a tight collar around the neck having an O – ring. These O-ring collars are a symbol of submission among the community of BDSM sex.

2. D-ring shaped

Exactly like O-ring shaped, these collars have a D-ring shape. This D-ring can be normally seen with the collars of the pets. Thus, proving that the sub is a pet of the Dom. 

3. Chokers

Chokers are the most famous and worn collars in BDSM relationships. They are the symbol of punishment. 

4. String Necklace

String necklaces are made in such a manner that they look like a pendant. It can be worn very easily by the sub without letting anyone know why it has been worn. Only the Dom will know that she is her submissive.


In simple words – you should wear a collar in which you feel comfortable. BDSM relationships start with the understanding and respect for dominant and submissive. A clear discussion and consent are taken before the couple enters into a BDSM relationship and therefore, a Dominant should always understand the choice of collar you have for yourself. 

Normally, O-ring or D-ring necklaces are worn by the subs so that they can participate in the public event without informing anybody about their relationship status except their master.

You can also wear a pendant that is tight and round the neck. It will ignite the excitement in your partner for the coming night and you will prove your commitment too along with your routine dressing.


As already mentioned that a day collar is not something that is unique and seeks a lot of attention; you can wear any type of necklace or jewelry which serves your purpose. Therefore, a normal jewelry shop or clothing shop is enough to purchase such types of collars.

Remember that you only need to inform your master that you are owned by him; no others should know about this. It may create an issue as well if others get to know this as it may stop you from entering that place.

You can also purchase these collars from different online sources such as Amazon. In my opinion, you can also tie a handkerchief around your neck as a symbol of your master and you know from where a handkerchief can be purchased.


Before you go and purchase a day collar, you must look at the below points so that you can decide whether it is necessary to purchase it or not:

a. Can a sub without a Dom wear a collar?

Yes! A sub can wear a day collar even if she does not have a partner. These days, it is seen that many subs wear it as a fashion statement. They also consider this a lifestyle and their commitment to themselves.

If a sub wears a collar without a Dom, it means she loves herself and is ready to be a submissive for his future master. So, even if you don’t have a partner you can spank your ass as a punishment; go ahead and purchase one for yourself.

b. Do all Doms make their sub wear a collar?

BDSM starts with consent and during the negotiations, all the rules and limitations are discussed. If during this negotiation either Dom or the Sub decides that they would not like to wear the collar; the Dom will not demand his sub for the same.

They can also decide what type of collar they would love and what they will reject. Finally, if the sub wants, she can wear it just to show her commitment even if the Dom does not ask her to do so. There is no hard and fast rule for the same.

c. What are the other collar etiquettes?

The basic etiquette is that the collar is purchased by the Dom and is gifted to the sub. When the dynamic is going to end; it should be returned to the Dom. However, if Dom does not want it back, the sub can continue wearing it.

If the collar is purchased by the sub herself, she can wear it or remove it as per her own choice. Although, when in a relationship, she will have to follow the rules.

A day collar is a symbol of commitment toward the master. A Dom gifts this collar to the submissive partner and she wears it to prove that she is owned. Mainly two types of collars are there – one is used when you are in playtime and the second one during the daytime.

The one you wear during the daytime is discrete and does not seek a lot of attention.

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