The concept of “safe word” can be understood if you are a member of a kink community. If you are not a member of kink community then it would be difficult for you to understand this concept.
There are high chances that you have heard this word in Fifty shades of grey!! So, in this article, the discussion will be based on the concept linked with “Safe word” and in relation to this different other pointer will also be discussed.
Also read: BDSM Punishments, BDSM Dating sites, BDSM GIfs, Sub punishments, how to be a dom, femdom ideas
Safe Word Ideas : 15 Best good safe word Examples
What is a safe word?
A safe word is a term which is used at the time of having sex and it is used to end the scene and to give it a stop. In simple words, safe word is considered as the word which is considered during sex and it is considered to stop the activity which is going on and it is done on immediate basis.
So, we can say that this word is used at the time of having sexual intercourse but on the other hand, we can also say that this word should not be commonly used at the time of having sex.
Hence, safe word means the word which is used to stop the action on immediate basis and it is done on immediate basis only.
It is commonly considered as the safe word or a signal which is taken into consideration by an individual to communicate their overall physical and also emotional state of mind to the other person with whom they are having intercourse.
It is also a word which is used by the partner at the time of having sex and the person becomes rough so to stop it the other person speaks uses this word.
Why it is so important for everyone?
It has been noticed that the pop culture has become famous now days and also more focused towards sex, so many individuals have now started crossing their boundaries in the bedroom and now they are experiencing the different sort of sex play.
The best examples linked with it are breath play, use of scarves, spanking with the paddle. If these are considered then it is important to use the safe word as each person has its own limit and when that limit is reached it is important that the other person should know about it!
At the time of having sex if you are not able to accept that pain that it would be beneficial for you to convey this to your partner and this is done only by using the safe word.
If your partner really wants to be safe and enjoy sex than he will immediately stop after using the safe word. It’s all depends on your partner understanding and how much caring he or she is for you at the time of having sex. So, this also indicates the attitude of your partner towards you!
Many times, at the time of having sex the boundaries are crossed so the “safe word” is considered to communicate to end the process or the action.
It is also related to overall safety. In any sexual scenario, you have the chance to say no or stop to withdraw the actions immediately if you are not feeling good or safe at the time of having sex but on the other hand, it is important to speak those words which are safe enough and indicates the understanding between the partner. So, using the safe word is good as it helps to maintain the boundaries!
How to reach to a discussion of the safe word?
It has been researched that safe word conversation is considered as the one which is taken into consideration by every sexually active individual and it may relate with one night stand or the discussion which is done with your long-term partner.
It is important to have communication within the partners related to the boundaries that need to be followed. It has been examined that in context to have sex there are many people who have certain boundaries that needs to be followed.
For example: many people think of having sex by using the protection as they don’t feel safe if protection is not used. So, if the boundaries are set than it would be easy for you to feel safe and if it is done than the sex will be fun between both the people.
The safe word which is used between the partners is considered as an understanding and it is necessary to maintain the same so that it would be easy to find out if any other partner is facing any issue! So, you can easily reach to the discussion of the safe word to make each other comfortable and secure!
How do you pick a good safe word?
It is very obvious for individuals to use the stoplight at the time of using the safe words. Like if you use green this means to go, yellow has the meaning linked with slowing down and red focuses towards too much and it should be stopped on immediate basis!
But it is not important to always consider these points. It is important for you to only keep it short or if one word with only some of the syllables.
Apart from this, it is important to stay away from the foreign words as they can create too much confusion. So, always remember to stay away from the foreign words.
There are many people who keep on changing their safe word and use different words with their partners but on the other hand, there are many people who keep only one safe word and use it in the entire process.
It is not important that you keep track of which safe word is used with which person. It is mutual understanding between the partners and the safe word is decided on the basis of that only, so try to keep your words the same so that no confusion can take place further!
If you keep on thinking about which safe word to use with which person, it can disturb you as well! So, don’t create many safe words as it will help you out at the time of using it with different people! One safe word should be used so that you can remember it for a long time!
One of the best ideas may also be related with the use of safe words that are connected with your life! If you use it and it is linked with your life then it would be possible then you will not forget it!
So, always remember to consider the words which are linked to your own life story! If you do not link with your life then there is a high possibility that you will not remember it and have to create a new one! So, select the safe word with proper understanding and also by linking it with your life so that you cannot forget!
Apart from this, mutual understanding between the partners plays an important role and also it keeps your relationship healthy with your partner!
A list of a few safe word ideas?
Some of the safe word ideas can be:
So, these are considered as some of the safe word ideas which can be considered at the time of having sex. You can use these words as your safe word for sure and these are the easy words which can be considered by you! Such words will help you remember it for a long time!
When should you use a safe word?
You can use the safe word at the same moment you start feeling uncomfortable or not secure! At the time of having sex, if you are having some pain or you are triggered with something than you can definitely use the safe word!
Also, at the time of using safe words do not hesitate about what your partner will think, use it when you are uncomfortable! If you use the safe word during sex than you are entitled that you will not be judged and also no one will show anger towards you!
So, you are free to use the safe word whenever you want! Never feel uncomfortable at the time of using the safe word!
Before sex, you and your partner should decide the sex word and according to that if you want to use it in any scenario than you can go for it as it will help you to feel secure and comfortable at the time of having sex and also it will give an idea to your partner that you are in again if you use the safe word which is decided by you and your partner!
Few things you need to know about safe words
There are few things which are important for you to know in relation to the safe word.
Sub can exploit the safe oword, be careful.
Let us know that if you are using the safe word then there is nothing wrong in it. It is important for the sub that they should not feel guilty if it is used by the partner.
The issue arises when it is used as the way to get off something which they do not want to do. So, besides the requests linked with sex, the safe word can also be used if they are not able to tolerate the pain or handle the situation wisely.
It can establish a BDSM limit
It has been noticed that if couples are searching for new things such as anal play than safe words will help to show the direction and it will also help in pushing the limit of one person and to see that they are fine with what you are doing.
A non-verbal signal is also a must.
If choking is considered then it is important to make a commitment beforehand that safe gestures instead of words will be used. This can be linked with the hand signal or just putting the items in the hands of sub if they exceed the set limit.
Subs also tend to forgot safe word
Many times, Dom can create demands which are not fulfilled by the sub and cannot be achieved without considering mental and emotional aspects. So, this is the time when the sub should consider their safe words.
So, overall, it has been seen that safe word should be used at the time of having sex but on the other hand it is important for both the partners to agree on the safe words which are decided.
It is important for both the partners to use the safe words at the time of feeling pain or when they are not comfortable with any action.
At the same moment and with the mutual understanding the partner should use the safe word so that no issues can take place while doing sex.
If someone has used the safe word, then it is important for the partner to stop at the same moment or immediately and should also consider the opinion of the partner.